Do You Help TOO Much?

One day as a small opening appeared on a cocoon, a man sat for several hours watching a butterfly struggle to force its body through that little hole. Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had got as far as could, and could go no farther. So, the man decided to help the butterfly. He took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bits of the cocoon. The butterfly then emerged easily, but it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings. He thought that the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time. Neither happened, in fact; the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings. It never was able to fly.

What the man, in his kindness and haste, did not understand was that the restricted cocoon and the struggle required by the butterfly to get through the tiny opening, were nature’s way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings. Then the butterfly would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.

Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our life. If we were allowed to go through our life without any obstacles, it would cripple us. We would not be as strong as what we could be. We could never fly.

How many times have you looked back on a struggle, perhaps minute, or perhaps momentous, and thought how that situation, series of events, or cataclysmic shitstorm catapulted you into a new direction and/or opportunity you would have never landed in otherwise? Perhaps you have a new relationship as a result of this change of events. Perhaps a new career, or a more pleasant outlook. The possibilities are endless when we are open and navigate the storm with faith and optimism, knowing, that like all things, there will be change. Some planned, some unplanned, but nonetheless, change. With each turn of a corner, new opportunities arise, and we find ways in which to be grateful, for each event that has made us who we are.

Perhaps it isn’t your ship that’s sinking. Perhaps it’s a loved one, a friend, a partner, colleague or neighbor. Be mindful that in jumping in too quickly, or in offering a whole new boat rather than a life vest, may not create the necessary growth for the individual. Is this a person that always seems to step in %(&^&^? Certainly throw a lifeline, help your fellow man, but be careful of how much support you give, lest we leave that person paralyzed as they have not struggled enough from the cocoon so that they may take flight.

Help is indeed a four letter word, and can have tremendous positive impact, but in giving too much, can have paralytic ramifications. Everything in moderation while looking through the lens of grace.

With much sugar & a lot of soul!

Rhonda